I Choose My Own Destiny

Angela Mujukian
ladyBruin24@ucla.edu

Yes. We all know what the pre-med course is like: I average about two to three panic attacks per week. Random strangers constantly ask "Why do you want to be a doctor?" And I simply reply the same way thousands and thousands of other pre-med applicants have answered on their applications or during their interviews: "I want to save a life. I care about people. I know someone who passed away and it inspired me to become a doctor."

Medical schools have heard just about every answer there is and it is just not good enough in their eyes anymore. The admissions boards across the world are hard to please. They make it seem that unless I become an Olympic gold medalist or discover the cure for cancer, I am never getting into medical school, no matter how much community service I do, how many labs I’ve worked in, however many hours I have volunteered in a hospital, how good my grades are- it’s just not going to cut it.

The situation is simply mind-boggling. And the worse part are the UCLA counselors. I’ve personally talked to a handful of these individuals from different departments. And every time, I have left their office furious. I have found counselors to be discouraging, to put it in nice terms. They, in turn, accuse me of being stubborn and tell me to pursue another field or area of study.
I walk out of there leaving them with the remarks that, "No matter what you say, I’m still going to pursue the field of medicine." I’ve heard just about all that you can hear from counselors, "Why don’t you reevaluate your life, medicine is not the only possibility." As if my plate is not full enough for them to add this discouragement.

On top of that, I also receive negativity from my family and friends because they just don’t understand. "Do you want to go to school for that long? Why don’t you go into pharmacy?" Maybe because I don’t like pharmacy! If there is a force and a passion that’s imbedded in my soul and it keeps pushing me to proceed and be successful then that drive is never going to stop until I get where I want to be.

Many students choose to study abroad and go on medical trips, get published for research, shadow doctors, volunteer in hospitals, become Emergency Medical Technicians, join 100 pre-med clubs, and go to New York on a summer research program, all to increase their chances of being admitted into a good medical school. Yet, if they don’t have straight A’s and amazing MCAT scores, then they are ultimately out of luck.

People go to extreme lengths to get into medical school because it is becoming increasingly difficult to get into any school in the United States. Many go to graduate school, do a post-baccalaureate, and reapply. Most students stay for a fifth year in their undergraduate career to try and improve their grades. It gets more and more competitive every year that now students are seeking to go to schools in the Caribbean because it is the only school that accepts them.
Just to add more stress to my life, I am presented with the question of what to major in.

I have no idea! I get told from the handful of ‘helpful’ counselors at UCLA that because I am pre-med I should major in science, perhaps Biology. I have a profound interest in English and I absolutely hate Biology. It never occurred to me that I would actually need to know how many legs a crab has or that starfish are echinoderms that belong to the class Asteroidea, in order to diagnose a patient.

I don’t need to know that.Still, I would rather read British literature and close-read a poem, because the technique of excavating the piece, like a patient, is a craft, and it doesn’t require one to know about the animal kingdom.

I have probably thought about every single major and minor at UCLA ranging from Psychobiology, Biology, Physiological Sciences, to English, Public Health, the History of Science & Medicine, Womens’ Studies, Psychology, and History.

The question embedded in my mind is, what are med schools looking for? If they want me to major in the study of trash, I will do it. Then I ask myself whether I would choose a subject that interests me or something that will boost my grade point average.

I get flustered over all these questions that run in my mind on a daily basis as I strive to become that successful applicant who makes it. At the end of the day, my life is like a lottery ticket or a toss of a coin to the admission boards. Heads: I get in. Tails: I don’t. All I know is that I cannot leave my success in their hands. I have to choose my own route because, in the end, I choose my own destiny. I have become deaf to all negativity and no matter how many times people discourage me, I will persevere and will not stop until I achieve my dream.