By Kiso Pogosyan
Kisopogos@gmail.com
There are many ethnicities, Armenian being one of them, with cultural traditions that place great emphasis on the bride-to-be’s virginity before marriage. But what truly makes one a virgin? Is it just having an un-popped cherry? Or does it go deeper than that (no pun intended)…
On my quest to find out what Armenian men considered to be “wife-material,” I asked many of them what they expect from their pure wives-to-be. A very memorable response, from someone who shall remain unnamed, was, “I want to be my wife’s first. I want her to be completely inexperienced -- no hand-jobs, no blow-jobs, no anal sex, no intercourse -- you know, a total virgin.” I probed, “But what if she IS a virgin, and has given hand-jobs and blow-jobs?” The response I received, “Then, she’s not really a virgin, but more of a slut.”
W-O-W.
I find it amazing and utterly stupid that the majority of Armenian men hold this belief. I’ve heard from you guys (and all across rap music as well) that you want a “Lady in the street, but a freak in the bed.” Well, that’s great – cause most of us actually are freaks (in more ways than one). But must we release our inner sexual goddesses till after we’ve got the ring on our finger?
Please, please, puh-lease rid yourself of this stupid mentality. Our bodies are designed in a way for us to start having these sexual desires and urges at a young age, just like men. Plus, as the clichéd saying goes, practice makes better. And you do want us to be good in bed right?
Anyways, the narrow-mindedness of Armenian men isn’t really the topic I’d like to start discussing… moving along.
I don’t have a problem with women having pre-marital sex. Love has no boundaries and life is short. So if you want to bone someone, then why not just do it? Forget judgmental people; you should be your own judge.
But what I absolutely do have a problem with, is women who find themselves doing everything imaginable, anal sex included, so long as the form of intercourse that will undoubtedly make them impure, isn’t tried till after holy matrimony. Besides falling victim to societal norms (if you could even call them norms), it’s just pathetic. Just f*** the guy -- trust me, he wants it as badly as you do.
But what do we find happening instead? Hymenorraphy.
Hymenorraphy, better known as hymen reconstructive surgery, is becoming more and more popular. It is a surgical procedure in which the remnants of the hymen are sewn together and inserted as part of the vaginal wall, creating an illusion that the woman in question is technically a virgin. And if there are no hymen remnants left (since you’ve got a bad case of the hornbug), health care providers insert a gelatin casing filled with a blood-like substance about a week prior to your honeymoon, causing you to bleed when you have sex “for the first time” with your newlywed husband.
W-O-W.
Seriously people? Has it really come to this?
Well, these are my thoughts on the matter. But thankfully, none of this really applies to me, cause I’m a virgin… I swear.
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3 comments:
Nice post & nice blog. I love both.
Virginity is all in how you perceive it. If you believe that there is that special someone out there for you, then he or she being the only and the first should be important. It says you waited to share intimacy only with her (or him). The fact that you reduce sex to a recreational activity to be shared with anyone makes me think that perhaps you don't really care about your soul mate as much as others do. That's fine, just don't try to convince us that your mistakes are somehow modern or civilized. Please understand that some people just have more restraint and believe in higher, more meaningful, relationships than you do. The reward is something between two lovers that is completely theirs and no one else's - something you will never get to have with anyone. So, yes, you are not a virgin; which means you are truly fucked.
And I find it funny you say "forget judgemental people" - yet you seem judgemental of Armenian values (which tend to be universally valued.)
So..um..forget you, right?
If you truly believe in the sanctity of sex as solely a consummation of love between two soul mates, then I am certain that you will have no objections to holding both male and female counterparts in any union to the same standards. For your argument to be truly valid, young men would also have to refrain from any sort of sexual activity until marriage in the quest to create "higher, more meaningful, relationships". Yet, more often than not, young Armenian males feel free to experiment sexually before settling down with their "pure" virginal bride. Your argument implies that these males have already tarnished the sanctity of sex by reducing it to a "recreational activity", even if it is for supposedly "educational" purposes. Consequently, it would be impossible for these males to genuinely create the sort of intimacy which can only exist between individuals who have waited to ensure that they are the first in their lover's life. If you want a pure relationship, then you must be willing to earn it.In short, this fairy tale love can only exist if young men are willing to uphold their end--until then, quit blaming your ruined fantasy lives on women.
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